Last Sunday, at church, I noticed two little girls asking questions about a particular young lady who is in a wheelchair. When the lady, in the wheelchair, entered the sanctuary, the little girls stopped what they were doing and looked very curious at each other and then to their mothers. One little girl was very loud and said "Why is that lady in a wheelchair can she not walk?" The mother began sushing the child and lead her out of the room. The other little girl just looked at her mother to see if she would answer. I thought this mother did a great job with her reply. The second mother must have known the lady and replied, "This is Ms. Marcia and she has to use the chair in order to come to church. She enjoys coming just like we do however, she can't use her legs so she must rely on this wheelchair to help her come." The little girl asked, "Why can't she use her legs like we do?" The mother replied, "When Macia was younger, she was in a car accident which hurt her legs and right now she is unable to walk. Maybe one day she will be able to use them again." The little girl then said the sweetest words, "Mommy we should pray for Marcia to use her legs again so she can walk just like us." The mother replied, "Honey, that is a great idea, we will start today." I feel as though the first mother could have communicated better with explaining to the child rather than sushing her and ushering her out. However; I do not know what she told her once they were out. I thought the second mother took the needed time to explain the child's question. I also thought her answer was great! Parents and teachers alike must continually ask ourselves how we can use language for our ultimate purpose: to support children's developmet and learning (Rainer & Durden, 2010). When communicating with children, I think it is very important to answer their questions the best we can. We need to listen to them and not ignore what they are thinking. They are very curious and will grow and development effectively when time is invested into their lives.
References
Rainer Dangel, J., & Durden, T. R. (2010). The nature of teacher talk during small group activities. YC: Young Children, 65(1), 74-81. Retrieved from the Walden Library using the Education Research Complete database. http://ezp.waldenulibrary.org/login
I love the juxtaposition of the two mothers. They show two very different ways of communicating with children. Through many of our courses, we have learned that surpressing children's awareness of human differences has an adverse effect on their acceptance. Thanks for sharing your observations!
ReplyDeleteAmy, your story about the two different ways that mothers responded to their children’s curiosity illustrated an effective and ineffective response to helping children understand diversity. The answers given by the mother who did not run from the topic were sincere and thoughtful. That mom is leading her child on a strong pathway to avoid ableism. The mother’s answer did not treat a disability as though it was shameful and not to be talked about. She addressed it as she would any other human difference. I appreciate your beautiful story in this week’s blog—what a great way example of anti-bias communication you have shared with us! -Susan
ReplyDeleteHi Amy,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your post. Indeed the way in which the mothers communicated with their children were indeed very good also. In life we have to know about how to deal with certain situations as they arise. Children are born curious and creating an atmosphere to communicate with them is a good way for them to learn about their environment and things that are apart of it. Well said!!!
Amy-
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this story. I agree that the second mother did a great job of communicating effectively with her child. She listened to the child's question, and gave an answer that she would understand. Then, when the child had more questions, she answered those as well. By doing this, the child was able to digest the information given to her and come up with the great solution of praying to help the lady.
-Melanie